Greetings fellow Bizarros:

It looks like Utah is finally coming into the 21st century,
and it only took a global recession to do it! After more
than 40 years, some of the strictest – and most bizarre –
liquor laws in the nation are being hustled out the barroom
door, yet another sign that even a state dominated by tee-
totaling Mormons is willing to reconsider decades-old mores
if it helps the economy.

No longer will bartenders be separated from customers by a
glass partition known as a “Zion Curtain.” And patrons won’t
have to join a social club or pay a membership fee before
entering bars.

“Having to pay $5 or $10 to join a club to drink any kind
of alcoholic beverage is absurd,” said Mark Caraway, a San
Diego businessman who travels to Salt Lake City at least
once a month.

Tourists frequently leave bars and restaurants here after
becoming flummoxed at what it takes to get a drink. And the
state’s tourism industry has frequently complained that the
liquor laws send lucrative conventions and skiers fleeing
to neighboring Colorado.

While not technically requiring a license, Utah does require
anyone entering a bar to be a member of the club or a
member’s guest. At most bars, anyone can become a member by
paying a state-ordered fee for a three-week pass that costs
at least $4. An annual membership costs at least $12. And a
separate membership is required at each bar.

If anything, some locals say eliminating the membership
requirement will spare them from sitting out in the cold
waiting for friends to sponsor them, and it should free up
more money.

Bizarrely,

Lewis

————————————————————

+——————- Bizarre Sex Laws ——————–+

In Lebanon, men are legally allowed to have sex with
animals, but the animals must be female. Having sexual
relations with a male animal is punishable by death.

In Bahrain, a male doctor may legally examine a woman’s
genitals, but is forbidden from looking directly at them
during the examination. He may only see their reflection
in a mirror.

The penalty for masturbation in Indonesia is decapitation.

There are men in Guam whose full-time job is to travel
the countryside and deflower young virgins, who pay them
for the privilege of having sex for the first time.
Reason: under Guam law, it is expressly forbidden for
virgins to marry.

In Hong Kong, a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill
her adulterous husband, but may only do so with her bare
hands. (The husband’s lover, on the other hand, may be
killed in any manner desired.)

In Cali, Colombia, a woman may only have sex with her
husband, and the first time this happens her mother must
be in the room to witness the act.

In Santa Cruz, Bolivia it is illegal for a man to have
sex with a woman and her daughter at the same time.

[From davesdaily.com]

***

———- Police: Robbers robbed while fleeing ———–

MILWAUKEE, Wash. – Milwaukee police said a pair of unlucky
alleged robbers were targeted by another group of thieves
as they fled from a jewelry store. Lt. Thomas Welch said
two men, ages 31 and 40, took money and jewelry from the
store on the south side of the city at about 10:50 a.m.
Wednesday while armed with at least one handgun, and were
confronted by a group of four men as they attempted to
flee, the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel reported. Welch said
the four men robbed the two original robbers, sparking a
fight that turned into a car chase. He said the two men
who allegedly robbed the jewelry store and two men from
the second group, ages 22 and 27, were arrested. The money
and jewelry were not recovered and police were searching
for additional suspects. He said investigators were look-
ing into whether the two groups of men knew each other
prior to the incident.

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——– Last laugh: Woman cut daughters from will ———

OLDHAM, England – A British woman whose daughters tried to
have her evicted in the 1990s cut her offspring out of her
will, leaving her entire $30,000 to a local hospice. Megan
Swanston, who died in December at age 85, became embroiled
in a family conflict when her three daughters attempted to
have her evicted from her Oldham, England, home in 1994,
The Daily Mail reported. The house had been bequeathed to
Swanston’s daughters by their paternal grandfather when he
died in 1973 but Swanston claimed her children had promised
to let her live out her days in the home. After a two-year
legal battle, the matter was settled out of court with the
house sold to a property company, with the stipulation that
Swanston be allowed to remain the sitting tenant the news-
paper said. However, Swanston and her daughters never
mended their relationship and it was revealed after her
Dec. 4 death that she had cut her daughters out of her
will, The Daily Mail said. The document stated that she
didn’t want any of her money going to the trio because of
the way they had treated her. Swanston’s money instead went
to Dr. Kershaw’s Hospice in Oldham.

————— Strip club plans job fair —————-

PROVIDENCE, R.I. – The office manager of a Rhode Island
strip club says bosses are hoping the state’s unemployment
rate will help them draw in new employees. Lori Savickas,
office manager of the Foxy Lady strip club in Providence,
said the business is holding a job fair Saturday with an
aim to hire 25 people for positions as dancers, managers,
DJs, bouncers and bartenders, the Providence Journal
reported Friday. Savickas said the state’s high unemploy-
ment rate — more than 10 percent — could lead more people
to consider jobs in adult entertainment. “With the way
unemployment is right now, there are a lot of people look-
ing for a job who normally wouldn’t come to the Foxy Lady,”
Savickas said. “They’re just hungry to start working some-
where. They might find out that it is totally different
than they expected.” She said bosses are hoping the
infusion of new blood into the club will help draw in
customers who are being more conservative with their
spending in light of the economic recession. “Everyone
is choosy right now about where they spend their money
because they don’t have the money to spend,” Savickas
said.

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———- Speeder fined despite sneezing defense ———-

DEREHAM, England – A former police officer must pay a
fine for speeding on his motorcycle despite claiming his
actions were caused by a sneeze, a British magistrate says.
Magistrate Margaret Oechsle fined Donald Johnstone, 62,
$223 for going 10 miles above the speed limit in a 30 mph
zone in the county of Norfolk last May, The Mirror said.
“You accept your speed increased and with any speed over
31 mph our sentencing guidelines come into play,” said
Oechsle, who also hit Johnstone with $167 in court costs.
Johnstone had tried to explain away his speeding
indiscretion by blaming it on a fit of sneezing he endured
while motorcycling. “My sneezes tend to be extremely
violent,” he told the court. “And I accept that my speed
must have increased because of the movement of my hands.”
The Mirror said just in case his sneezing defense fell
short, Johnstone also claimed the camera that caught him
speeding wasn’t set at the right angle.

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>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> READER COMMENTS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Lewis, You nailed it on the head! I don’t mind helping out
the people who deserve the help. The ones I’m complaining
about are the ones that are being foreclosed on with two
brand new cars in the driveway, 52″ HDTV, all the latest
gadgets (you get the idea) and bought a home that a
reasonable budget wouldn’t cover because the Jones’ home
was 3 square feet smaller.

That has got to be the most disgusting thing I have ever
seen! I’m tempted to go take a scalding hot shower! -Patty
[I know what you mean, Patty, but it wouldn't help much.]

I can just see bringing your wife along and she can pig out
at the buffet while you get laid, yeah right. Good way to
get killed. -squaredancer
[Depends on how liberal your wife is. We are talking about
Germany, here.]

In 1999, the housing industry (Fannie Mae) was forced to
lower their loan requirements, thus allowing more sub-prime
borrowers to acquire a home. This was clearly not a smart
move, like a time bomb, this bad piece of economic drivel
would grow and mushroom during following administrations.
Some simple research reveals who the author of this fiasco
is, and several articles were written at the time that
state clearly this could harm the economy down the road.
But it sure made a lot of people happy at the time! These
same home buyers are now crying the blues, and the rest of
us will suffer for the sub-prime lending habits. -Kris

Originally I thought that video was a spoof on the cult
classic ‘Reefer Madness’ . It was the term ‘420′ that made
me think this, but we did some research and found that the
term ‘420′ actually originated in 1971. It was a term used
by a group of kids that would meet at a statue after
detention in high school. Either way, if they would just
legalize it they could start to pull this country out of
the recession. Think about it. -Dave
[I have a similar feeling. I did a column last year on the
whole hemp controversy. It seems foolish, hypocritical and
wasteful to me.]

—————— END OF READER COMMENTS ——————