Greetings fellow Bizarros:

I’m doing a little goofing around with Bizarre News, folks,
and I want you to know what’s going on. You’ll notice right
away that there are fewer ads. We were in a sales meeting
recently and the company brain trust decided that readers
might pay more attention to ads if there were fewer of them
to clutter up the page. Since Bizarre News has (had) the
largest number of ads of any Gophercentral publication we
get the pleasure of acting as the guinea pig.

But I didn’t want to thin the newsletter out too much so I
am also adding in something the geeks who work on our video
portal (www.EVTV1.com) cooked up. It’s called a Video Snack
Bar. It’s kind of like a ‘Best Of’ video selection from
EVTV1. So make sure to click around on it a little bit below.

And if you just miss the ads because you’re one of those
people who are shop-a-holics you can always subscribe to our
incredibly popular Deal of the Day newsletter. This is the
baby of our executive buyer, Anisa, and for being a strictly
commercial publication it is the most popular email on our
site. Maybe because the ‘Deals’ are usually so good.

Anyway, if you are interested in checking it out (you can
always unsubscribe later) just click the link below and
look for DEAL OF THE DAY at the top of the page under ‘Most
Popular.’

Look for Deal of the Day

Bizarrely,

Lewis

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+————- More Bizarre August Holidays ————–+

August 11 is Presidential Joke Day

August 12 is Middle Child’s Day

August 13 is Blame Someone Else Day

August 14 is National Creamsicle Day

August 15 is National Relaxation and National Failures Day

August 16 is Bratwurst Festival

August 17 is National Thriftshop Day

August 18 is Bad Poetry Day

August 19 is Potato Day

August 20 is National Radio Day

***

———- Police: Gorilla-suited robber foiled ————

CONWAY, Fla. – Police said a 21-year-old Florida restaurant
worker used a meat cleaver to fight off an attempted robber
wearing a gorilla suit. Investigators said the worker, who
was not identified, told police he was taking trash out
to the trash bin at Jimmy’s Japanese Hibachi in Conway at
about 11:24 p.m. Monday when the gorilla-suited attacker
appeared and punched him in the head, The (Myrtle Beach)
Sun reported. The employee struggled with the attacker and
made his way back inside the restaurant with the robber
in pursuit, police said. The suspect approached the cash
register but ran out of the restaurant when the employee
lodged a meat cleaver in the arm of the gorilla suit, the
police report said.

————————————————————
>—>—> Your Video Snack Bar <---<---<
Top Videos Of The Week

1. Classic Amos & Andy - IRS Office

http://c.gophercentral.com/Wswr

2. Amazed By Nature

http://c.gophercentral.com/LApX

3. Blue Hawaii - ELVIS

http://c.gophercentral.com/Izaj

4. Remembering Walter Cronkite

http://c.gophercentral.com/7aDV

5. Cartoon Classics - Tom and Jerry

http://c.gophercentral.com/ce2m

6. Unbelievable Super Heroes

http://c.gophercentral.com/MX6i

------------------------------------------------------------

---------- Travel site picks world's top mazes -----------

MANHATTAN BEACH, Calif. - The Longleat Hedge Maze in
Warminster, England, topped a California-based travel
Web site's list of the "Top Five Most Amazing Mazes."
VirtualTourist.com said it chose the Longleat Hedge
Maze for the top position on the list because of its
observation tower at the end that allows those who have
completed the maze to observe people who are still lost.
Coming in second was the Ashcombe Maze & Water Gardens
in Victoria, Australia, which was cited for its more
than 1,200 rose bushes including 200 varieties of the
flower. The Web site chose Cowtown Cattlepen Maze in
Fort Worth, Texas, for the No. 3 spot, saying the maze
is made more enjoyable by prizes offered for beating
the clock and other maze-goers. Soekershof Mazes and
Gardens in Klaas Voogds West, South Africa, was given
a mention for its local history-related clues that help
visitors find their way through the maze and the final
maze on the list, Schonbrunn in Vienna, Austria, was
chosen to round out the list for its rich history,
having been built in the 17th or 18th century and
restored at the end of the 20th century.

------------------------------------------------------------

-------------- House bought for $1 now free ---------------

RAINBOW, Calif. - A man who bought a historic Oceanside,
Calif., home for $1 and moved it to his property in
Rainbow, Calif., said he is now selling it for a lower
price -- free. Hayden Perrine said he had originally
planned to convert the house, which was built in 1889,
into an extension of his home, but San Diego County
permits and mandated restorations have made the project
too expensive, KGTV, San Diego, reported. "To do every-
thing they're asking me to do to this structure and put
the foundation in to code and to secure it to the exist-
ing home, it would cost me about $60,000," Perrine said.
Perrine purchased the house for $1 from the city of
Oceanside after it offered a number of homes for the
price with the stipulation that purchasers move the homes
at their own expense. He said the house is now listed on
Craigslist as free. He said the purchaser will have to
pay to move the house and conduct the county-mandated
restorations.

------------------------------------------------------------

Let Lewis take you on an UNCENSORED journey into the world
of the strange, the bizarre and the supernatural. Get The
Best of Bizarre News II Uncensored right here...F-R-E-E..
Bizarre Uncensored

————————————————————

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> READER COMMENTS <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

Lewis, doesn’t it scare you that the government can basically
kidnap a person who has done nothing wrong and incarcerate
them for weeks just because of out-of-date paperwork?
[There are a lot of other things the government does that
scares me more than a clerical mistake. The most frightening
words you can hear are, "I'm from the government and I'm
here to help."]

Call it communism or socialism but the U S has been on the
fast track to being a socialist government. Now with Obama
in office it’s happening even faster. Even the republican
party has joined the ranks of socialists. Our government
is doing everything possible to eliminate the “Individual
that has Rights and Responsibilities”. Everybody should
look to and expect the government to take care of every-
thing. –Russ
[Let's not be alarmist. To hear you describe it the United
States is half way to becoming Canada already!]

Lewis, What fo I have to do to get you to print one of my
comments? Send in a nude photo? –Petra
[Couldn't hurt.]

Lewis, I have a question…I had my gall bladder taken out
yesterday. It hurts. What should I do? –Jack
[How can your gall bladder hurt after it's been taken out?]

Hey, Lewis, did you know that it takes 856 licks to get
to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie pop? I have a lot
of free time. –Chris
[I can see that.]

I have not received my newsletter for the last 2 edition.
This goes to my AOL address. I have received the bizarre
video e-mail. All other newsletters show up fine, just
yours. When I don’t get the news I have to go to your site
to read it.
[Thank you for being so loyal. There was a small problem.
The Bizarre news email list was moved to a new server, but
the genius who did it only moved half the addresses. It
should be all fixed now.]

—————— END OF READER COMMENTS ——————

Hey, There’s A Buck On A Bike!

Hey, Is That The Headless Dogman? Lame, I know.

Hey, Joker! I Think I Found Your Mom!